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A 23-year-old woman came in the 11th month of pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid child anymore, kill him" and the doctor said "okay" and inserted the starter cables into her uterus and connected them to the battery and let it run for 6 full days
An 8-year-old girl came in and said "I want to have an abortion but I'm not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll solve it" and stole the baby, dissolved the girl, put the baby inside, sewed it up and when the little one woke up he said "congratulations, you got a healthy son" to which the little one asked "can I keep him?" and the doctor said "no" and ran him over in the parking lot with his new BMW
They made me sign a contract to promise to stop drinking from a medical waste bin (I signed someone else's name)
The doctor's assistant invented something called a "silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected the woman's vagina directly to the paper shredder so that the newborn could enjoy the "adrenaline life" for a few seconds
The oldest child we aborted was in the seventies, we didn't even know it was a baby until his wife brought him pictures
Doctors would put all sorts of in the womb, including a clown's nose, bicycle handles, a calendar and a whole range of Kerum (before bankruptcy)
After each successful abortion, the doctor would shout "serves you baby" and press a red button that would activate sirens and confetti would fall from the ceiling and everyone would get free kebabs
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