Biervampir [AUT] » Games » Genital Jousting Stats

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28 of 28 (100%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

Most Improved Tapulator

Learn how to literally just navigate the main menu.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 2:21pm

Go Left

Move to the left.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 11:10am

Go Right

Move to the right.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 11:10am

Meet Your Maker

Penetrate God.
Unlocked 19 May, 2018 @ 4:32am

Summer Job

Reminisce about your care-free days as a cactus picker.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 11:42am

Fire Inspector

Safely deploy all the fire extinguishers. For safety.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 11:16am

Early Bird

Swallow every worm.
Unlocked 19 May, 2018 @ 5:55am

Sleep No More

Don't let sleeping dongs lie.
Unlocked 13 Jan, 2019 @ 2:50pm

Self Defence

Use the cake knife to defend yourself from wedding guests.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 11:52am

Swan Tamer

Make peace with a gaggle of swans. Their natural instinct is to kill.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 11:54am

Bulking Gear

Use all the "supplements" you can for maximal gains.
Unlocked 19 May, 2018 @ 8:42am

Paperwork

Submit your monthly physical report.
Unlocked 19 May, 2018 @ 6:22am

Popcorn Buffet

Eat a disgusting amount of popcorn.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 11:49am

Appalling Appetite

You should see a doctor immediately.
Unlocked 19 May, 2018 @ 4:43am

Clumsy

Die a lot of times in your nightmares.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 12:07pm

A Better John

Start taking responsibility for you actions.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 1:29pm

Master Unlocker

Collect enough milk to fill the tank.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 2:54pm

Couch Party

Have enough friends and enough controllers to play an 8 player game.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 3:27pm

Always Finishes First

Good at video games. Terrible at sex.
Unlocked 19 May, 2018 @ 7:18am

Generous Lover

Finish last in a Party Mode game.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 2:14pm

Spare Wheel

Be the only one locked out of an ouroborus.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 3:12pm

The Perfect Partner

Marry yourself in Abstinence.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 1:55pm

My Precious

Get all of the rings in Lord of the Rings.
Unlocked 19 May, 2018 @ 7:58am

Magnetic Basshole

Win Lights Out in under five seconds.
Unlocked 13 Jan, 2019 @ 1:26pm

Safety First

Everyone survives having sex in a trash-compactor full of needles.
Unlocked 19 May, 2018 @ 7:34am

Till Death Do Us

Have sex in the Date Night graveyard.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 2:06pm

Autopaedicatio

Penetrate yourself in Traditional Mode.
Unlocked 18 May, 2018 @ 1:36pm

Fussy Lover

Save yourself for that special orgy.
Unlocked 24 May, 2018 @ 12:15pm