Ssierno's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 4:28am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 5:50am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 4:26am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 25 Mar, 2021 @ 4:16am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 28 Feb, 2021 @ 11:20pm

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Unlocked 18 May, 2021 @ 1:05am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 5:45am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 1 Mar, 2021 @ 2:15am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 5 Mar, 2021 @ 1:27am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 25 Mar, 2021 @ 1:21am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 26 Apr, 2021 @ 1:39am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 18 May, 2021 @ 1:01am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 26 May, 2021 @ 4:47am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 3 Mar, 2021 @ 3:04am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 22 Mar, 2021 @ 6:07am

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

Unlocked 25 Mar, 2021 @ 4:32am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 25 Mar, 2021 @ 1:47am

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 17 May, 2021 @ 11:37pm

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked 25 Mar, 2021 @ 1:44am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 3 Mar, 2021 @ 2:55am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 28 Feb, 2021 @ 11:40pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 5 Mar, 2021 @ 2:01am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 18 May, 2021 @ 1:22am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 25 Mar, 2021 @ 1:52am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 3 Mar, 2021 @ 1:56am

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 22 Mar, 2021 @ 5:30am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 22 Mar, 2021 @ 6:05am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 25 May, 2021 @ 5:07am

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

Unlocked 17 Jun, 2021 @ 1:42am

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Unlocked 17 Jun, 2021 @ 1:36am

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Unlocked 17 Jun, 2021 @ 1:36am

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Unlocked 17 Jun, 2021 @ 1:48am

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Unlocked 17 Jun, 2021 @ 1:48am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 4:46am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 4:26am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 22 Mar, 2021 @ 6:17am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 1 Mar, 2021 @ 2:02am

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 5 Mar, 2021 @ 1:23am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 18 May, 2021 @ 12:01am

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 22 Mar, 2021 @ 5:40am

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked 25 Mar, 2021 @ 1:23am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 5:38am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 5:57am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 5:58am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 5:04am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 22 Mar, 2021 @ 5:32am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 1 Mar, 2021 @ 12:14am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2021 @ 5:51am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 5 Mar, 2021 @ 2:15am

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked 1 Mar, 2021 @ 1:10am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 1 Mar, 2021 @ 12:06am

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.

Unlocked 17 Jun, 2021 @ 2:02am

Gary vs. The K. Man

Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.

Unlocked 17 Jun, 2021 @ 1:48am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 17 Jun, 2021 @ 2:03am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 26 May, 2021 @ 5:02am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 2:53am

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 3:00am

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 3:00am

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 3:00am

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 3:00am

PooMasher

Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 3:07am

Hobo Sexual

Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 3:04am

Ode to Eddings

Deactivated all of the Vend-A-Cure XJ-2 units.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 3:05am

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 2:51am

You Snow Nothing John Blow

Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2021 @ 3:08am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 5 Mar, 2021 @ 1:21am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 17 Jun, 2021 @ 1:58am

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

22 / 30

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000