Hello, I noticed you have a profile picture of a very beautiful (but also intelligent looking!) female, and I am under the presumption that this goddess is you? It is quite astonishing to see a female here on Steam. I am quite popular around here on Steam, so if you require any guidance, please, throw me a mention. I will assist you at any hour, day or night. And, before you are mistaken, I do not seek your hand in a romantic way; although, I am not opposed in the event you are interested in me, as many women often are. I am a man of standard, and I do not how to just any female that comes my way, unlike my peers..Consider me a Player 2... A companion, a partner, and perhaps we can enjoy some video games together some time. I see you play TF2? I am a TF2 aficionado, so I would be happy to assist you in game. Platonically of course, unless you (like many others) change your mind on that. I look forward to our future together (as friends of course.)

give me my festive bonesaw

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Post this on the walls of the 12 prettiest Girls you know...
If you get this you are a very pretty girl and should be proud!
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thy smelleth