Yeetus that Fetus, My Good Sir/Ma'am/It

Until today. This morning was my father's funeral. At the procession, my brother asked me to say a few words. I told him I only needed one.

With confidence, I approached the podium. I gazed out upon the gathering of sad faces. I cleared my throat and leaned into the microphone.

"Yeet," I spake.

Suddenly, my father leapt from his hand-crafted mahogany coffin, the gunshot wound still in his chest. He sprinted up to the podium with the energy of a man without a gunshot wound in his chest.

"Y'all hittin' that dirty ♥♥♥♥in' yeet at my funeral?" he ejaculated. He raised his hand to thump me.

"Not so fast, pa." I grabbed his hand. "Yaint thumpin' no mo'."

My father looked at me with eyes as open as the gunshot wound in his chest. A tear fell from his right eye, which also had a monocle. "The student becomes the teacher," he said.

"The student becomes the yeetcher," I corrected him.