Please do not insert your penis into a vacuum cleaner.

For starters, the vacuum cleaner might be dirty. It's likely that there might be dirt, dust, and bacteria that could cause an infection if they come into contact with sensitive tissues.

The vacuum cleaner is also dry. The penis is meant to be moist, and a vacuum cleaner with high suction power could chafe some of the delicate skin that could cause bleeding, flaking, irritation, swelling, and abrasions.

The vacuum cleaner will not hesitate to be rough with your penis- prolonged suction could damage the blood vessels, as well as stretch your penis. This could lead to moving parts in the vacuum damaging it further, or even getting stuck and needing medical intervention.

Be careful where you put your penis- it is not as pleasant as it sounds on surface level.

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