Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the ♥♥♥♥” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

I'm not a boomer. I am not a boomer. Do not f ucking call me a boomer ever again. I am quite honestly one of the least boomer people you have ever met. I make jokes about depression, mad f ucking f ucked depression. I am not boomer. I am not a boomer. Stop saying I am a boomer. If you were a boomer, I would have probably already punched the s hit out of you by now, but fortunately you are a zoomer whose body remained un-touched by my fat, meaty, fists because I AM NOT A BOOMER. If I was a boomer though, you would find my Jackhammer pounding your face with my fists. Luckily for you, I am NOT A BOOMER, and you will have your virgin face remain unpounded ad infinitum. Actually, it seems to me like you are the boomer here. You are a boomer, not me. I am not a boomer, and I will never be. If I was ever a boomer in a past life (which I WASN'T), I would be killing myself right now, that is how boomer I AM NOT.

hey, sorry I saw your profile and I just thought you looked cute in your picture, I really wanted to tell you that)) It's really rare to see girls playing video games haha! I don't know why its a guy thing honestly im like really against misogyny and like ill be the one in the kitchen making sandwiches. We should really play rust sometime its a really cool survival game with a lot of scary moments, but don't worry ill be there to protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirting I swear Im just trying to be friendly I really like your profile picture sorry was that too far? Really sorry i'm really shy I don't go out much haha add me on skype we should talk more you look really nice and fun xxx

Airplanes aren't real. I figured out how they do it.
The windows are TV screens. The whole thing moves on big tracks like a rollercoaster that moves through underground tunnels in the Earth. Airports are more like train stations. They do this because the sky is full of monsters that they don't want us to know about. The planes we see in the sky are the monsters. The government made the Earth-trains look like the monsters so they could lie to us better.

Don't contact me.

You're So Funny Bro ... I literally died laughing from that joke. Your joke was so original and complex that the simpleminded might not even understand it. You know what, while I'm laughing at your hilarious joke, I want you to raise my kids and f uck my wife. I'll probably be laughing for the next 22 years so I won't be able to take care of them. I ask you to pull out your 16-inch c ock and insert it into my wife's tight v agina.

Also, you might want to start asking for other people's iq's before sharing this joke with them due to the fact that some people might not get it and get r/woooshed. You know what, I'm going to save this on every device I have to show your kids in the future why I'm not their father anymore.

Anyway, enough of me rambling. I'm going to sign the divorce papers so you can f uck my wife asap and share your superior genes with my bloodline so i can also be somewhat a part of your great legacy.

please, PLEASE, stop referring to women as females. it’s dehumanizing. women don’t like it. not to mention it’s weird to say men and females in the same sentence. just say women. a majority of the time, when someone says “females,” the follow up is deeply rooted in misogyny. it’s also grammatically weird. female is often used as an adjective, not a subject (example: female cat). it’s often used to describe animals, not people. it’s an easy way to call women inferior without saying it out loud. Additionally, when you refer to women as females, you’re also reducing women to their reproductive parts and abilities, which is just gross and demeaning. i'm sorry but if you're a male then you're nothing more than a pig, and we don't need you anymore to reproduce in our society because now we have trans women. so just die or something.