when I was born, my mother and father had a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ ass job with minimum wage. After multiple years with my parent dropping me on the sink, toilet and in ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, my dad said he was going to get some napkins at the stores (Napkins was a codeword for condoms). It's been 15 years and he's still looking for condoms, and so began my first anime. I saw it laying in the dumpster next door to my apartment, it was a "shiny" copy of the first 10 episodes of Naruto with a bit of fecees smeered in one of the corners, I opened it and it contained a dvd and a suicide note from the previous owner which said "This anime was so bad that I killed myself" And there I began watching Naruto on a potato I taped a dvd driver too, but I changed quickly after I realised it wasn't real anime, it was noob anime, so I started to watch real anime, like Chikyuu Shoujo Arjuna and Kuuchuu Buranko (you've probably never heard of them, cuz it's not so popular) instead of Attack on Titan. Too many people enjoy attack on titan, therefore it's not a real anime.

Year and years of watching REAL anime I came to the conlusion that I was going to travel to Japan, my vocabulary was good and I could the most necessary words needed to live down there, Kanpai, konitchua, konseimas and arigato. The first day I got down to tokyo I might've experienced a bug. The subtitles seem'd to be broken, so I couldn't understand anything they said. I looked online to see what the problem was, and I found a solution. I had to travel to a "Weeb convention". I ordered tickets and taped together a Full metal alchemist costume out of trash and ductape I found on some hobo dead in the streets. It was perfect. When I came in to the convention they denied me entry because I looked and smelled like ♥♥♥♥. someone looked at me and said "Wow, I also like Naruto", so I took a ♥♥♥♥ in my cupped hands and threw it at him.

When I got home I realised that someone stole my shoes made out of industrial garbage bags and old bandaids, so I quickly went on craigslist to buy some new ones. When I went to get the shoes, some old hag drugged me and drove me away. When I woke up she quickly realized that I was "ehrm..... too special to be worth even a dollar", she told me: "You're like a rusty spoon in the knife drawer", and ever since that day I've been selling my depression to emos