The real reason you can't invade Australia is because it doesn't exist. Australia is not real. It’s a hoax, made for us to believe that Britain moved over their criminals to someplace. In reality, all these criminals were loaded off the ships into the waters, drowning before they could see land ever again. It’s a coverup for one of the greatest mass murders in history, made by one of the most prominent empires.

hey, sorry I saw your profile and I just thought you looked cute in your picture, I really wanted to tell you that)) It's really rare to see girls playing video games haha! I don't know why its a guy thing honestly im like really against misogyny and like ill be the one in the kitchen making sandwiches. We should really play rust sometime its a really cool survival game with a lot of scary moments, but don't worry ill be there to protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirting I swear Im just trying to be friendly I really like your profile picture sorry was that too far? Really sorry i'm really shy I don't go out much haha add me on skype we should talk more you look really nice and fun xxx

After a good game in H1Z1, i added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We got chatting, over the next couple of months we became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great H1 and most importantly true friendship.

I invited him to my house for a H1Z1 lan party. He said he was coming so i was looking forward to meeting him in real life.

When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear, i felt his hard ♥♥♥♥ push against my leg. I punched him and then 1 tapped him. Turns out he was gay.

Don't trust this guy

Now taking applications for a gf. You must be:

1. Female

2. Age 16-23

3. Japanese (exceptions will be made for white girls if small and skinny)

4. Willing to do as I ask

5. Have an IQ lower than mine (164)

6. Have 0 male friends

7. Cook 3 meals for me a day

8. Be willing to split the bill on a date

9. Be into kinky stuff (will discuss in PM)

10. Send nudes every day I do not see you nude in person

11. Have sex with me as I ask

12. Be on birth control (condoms make me feel trapped, I simply can’t find anything that fits)

13. Ideally not have a job

14. Install a tracking app on your phone so that I know your location at all points

I am a kind gentlemen who will protect you at all times and in return all i ask is you pledge yourself to me. Please message me if you feel you fit this quota.

wawawewa

Comment is commentful