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25 of 35 (71%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

ENTOMOLOGIST

50 kills using bees.
Unlocked 26 Apr, 2014 @ 7:59am

ARSONIST

150 kills using fire.
Unlocked 26 Apr, 2014 @ 8:18am

DANNY TREJO

100 kills using machete in melee.
Unlocked 19 Feb, 2014 @ 7:01am

PSYCHO DUNDEE

50 kills using boomerang machete.
Unlocked 19 Feb, 2014 @ 7:37am

CAMELBACK

Piss 100 gallons of urine.
Unlocked 21 Apr, 2014 @ 1:39pm

SUCKTASTIC!

Suck up 500 items with the shop vac.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2014 @ 6:14pm

DON'T TAZE ME BRO

Taze 200 victims.
Unlocked 19 Feb, 2014 @ 6:37am

T.J. HOOKER

Arrest 200 perps.
Unlocked 2 Apr, 2014 @ 11:07am

NEUROSURGEON

300 headshot/decap kills.
Unlocked 8 Feb, 2014 @ 9:09am

SCHWARZENEGGER

200 kills using M-60.
Unlocked 13 May, 2013 @ 11:00am

JACK THOMPSON WAS RIGHT

Kill 1000 unarmed bystanders.
Unlocked 26 Apr, 2014 @ 7:52am

EMO

Injure yourself.
Unlocked 12 May, 2013 @ 2:58pm

WOLVERINES R GHEY

50 badgersaw kills.
Unlocked 19 Feb, 2014 @ 7:05am

PRODUCT RECALL

Destroy 50 cars.
Unlocked 23 Mar, 2014 @ 6:14am

PROPERTY DAMAGE

Smash 50 windows.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2014 @ 6:08pm

THERE IS NO SPOON

Spend 900 seconds or more in catnip bullet time.
Unlocked 24 Apr, 2014 @ 9:34am

DO NOT PUSH THE BUTTON!

Disobey orders, given to you, and see what happens.
Unlocked 25 Dec, 2012 @ 11:33am

THE CHOICE WAS YOURS!

Choose path for the first time.
Unlocked 30 Dec, 2012 @ 3:05pm

COMMIES GO HOME!

Make Venezuela peacemakers go home.
Unlocked 8 Feb, 2014 @ 8:33am

SCOFIELD

Escape from prison.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2014 @ 4:47pm

REPO MAN

Return Thegways to the owner
Unlocked 31 Dec, 2012 @ 8:00am

SAYANARA, TREE HUGGERS

Arrest eco zealots leader.
Unlocked 7 Feb, 2014 @ 12:27pm

ALL PERPS MUST DIE!

Take out all the criminal scum infesting Catharsis!
Unlocked 8 Feb, 2014 @ 8:02am

AIN'T GOT COJONES!

Finish your business with Krotchy.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2014 @ 4:59pm

SPECIAL OLYMPIAN

Beat the game once. No restrictions apply. Everyone's a winner.
Unlocked 8 Feb, 2014 @ 8:33am



CAT WRANGLER

50 kills using cat.

REAL AMERICAN

Kill/incapacitate 235 terrorists.

PERSONAL JESUS

Beat game with zero kills.n(zombies and bosses don't count)

PETA CHAIRMAN

Kill no animals in one playthrough.

STALLONE

Complete game using only melee.

EASTWOOD

Complete game using only the pistol.

I AM THE LAW

Complete Good path without falling off.

KAVORKIAN

Euthanise 30 elderly folks.

DADDY NEVER LOVED ME

Complete game killing only males.

FAIL ZOMBIE

Respawn 20 times.