very very very noob player ancienct 5 at DOta2 play like a dog

very very very noob player ancienct 5 at DOta2 play like a dog

:tinder::rarebutterfly::lovely::lovely::lovely::lovely::lovely::rarebutterfly::tinder:
:rarebutterfly::lovely::MrSnuggles::MrSnuggles::lovely::MrSnuggles::MrSnuggles::lovely::rarebutterfly:
:lovely::MrSnuggles::theone::theone::MrSnuggles::theone::theone::MrSnuggles::lovely:
:lovely::MrSnuggles::theone::theone::theone::theone::theone::MrSnuggles::lovely:
:lovely::lovely::MrSnuggles::theone::theone::theone::MrSnuggles::lovely::lovely:
:lovely::lovely::lovely::MrSnuggles::theone::MrSnuggles::lovely::lovely::lovely:
:rarebutterfly::lovely::lovely::lovely::MrSnuggles::lovely::lovely::lovely::rarebutterfly:
:tinder::rarebutterfly::lovely::lovely::lovely::lovely::lovely::rarebutterfly::tinder:
Have a wonderful day! :heartp::dexo_happy:

Shut up.

I am a professional Dota2 report submitter. I do not care about winning or losing. I have one goal and one goal only. As soon as a game ends, I instantly disconnect and am greeted with the match overview screen. My mouse drifts toward the match ID. Within 20 milliseconds I've copied it to the clipboard and opened the match page on DotaBuff. Like clockwork, I hover my cursor over each one of my teammates' names and click the middle mouse button. Four new tabs open. I frantically navigate to each tab and, like an esteemed pianist playing a beautiful symphony, my fingers gracefully apply pressure to the CTRL and F keys before typing the words "Single Draft".

I can hardly contain my excitement. My hands shake as my mouse moves towards the "OK" button. As soon as I click it, yet another pop-up with the same message appears. I can't believe my luck. Two people put into low priority due to my reports. I'm almost too afraid to click "OK" now. Three people going to low priority from one game due to my reports alone would be too much to ask for, wouldn't it? Nevertheless, I muster the courage and am greeted once again with the most satisfying message one can receive in this life:

We've recently taken action against one or more players you reported for bad conduct. Thank you for helping to improve the Dota2 community!

Armed with three fresh reports, I click the "Play Dota" button and get ready to repeat the process. I am a professional Dota2 report submitter.