Attention all Fortnite Gamers, John Wick is in great danger, and he needs YOUR help to wipe out all the squads in the tilted towers. To do this, he needs a gold SCAR and a couple of chug-jugs. To help him, all he needs is your credit card number, the three numbers on the back, and the expiration month and date. But you gotta be quick so that John can secure the bag, and achieve the epic victory R O Y A L

PART III:
"What's so funny?" she protests.
"Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?"
"You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter.
"What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask.
"Teaching, I think."
"And if I was your student, what would I be learning?"
"Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?"
"Bermuda," I say.
"Oh wow. That's lovely."
"It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking."
"What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires.
"I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."

PART II:
Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette.
"Got a spare?" she asks.
"What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles.
"Conversation with me, duh."
I laugh.

PART I:
Nathalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink.

"Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Nathalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave.

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░▄██▌██████▄█▄█▄█▄█▄█▄████ ▌██▌ You've been visited by the fedora
▐████▄▀▀▀▀████████████▀▀▀▀ ███ of mystery and autism!
▐█████████▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄████ █▀ tip yours to 5 friends or you'll be
░░░▀▀████████████████████ haunted by the spirit of fashionable wear.

+rep nice guy ^^