Licensed Baptist preacher in Missouri, Professional Orangutan chiropractor, Volunteer coach for the Milwaukee special needs bowling team, Yakubian snow ape, Owner of the best Mexican restaurant/crematorium in the whole of the continental United States, Aspiring suicide bomber, The Green Knight at Medieval Times Orlando, Deputized anti corruption agent for the mighty and proud state of Denmark, Black Superman, rotund Brazilian airsoft player, world-infamous war criminal, Founder of the Farabundo Martí National Liberation Front, former non-commissioned officer in the Hyperborean armed forces (Marines 94-08), Delegate representing the Republic of Finland at the United Nations, award winning mayonnaise taster, due paying member of the Palestinian Islamic Jihad (para-glider unit) ,1:64 scale model of the Lunokhod 1 lunar rover, impoverished Burundian subsistence farmer, full time penguin erector at the Edinburgh zoo, and a justice on the Croatian Supreme Court. Underneath all this I am sensitive white boy