Recent reviews by Fresh Basileus of Byzantium

NAME: Bjorn, Helga
STATUS: Deceased
PREVIOUS OCCUPATION: (unemployed)
DESCRIPTION: Helga Bjorn is an overweight dancer coming from Sweden. She has almost no good tendencies, professing to a short temper, being unlucky, being cowardly, brooding, being claustrophobic and also agoraphobic. The reason for the two conflicting phobias is unknown. Aside from self-professed negative traits, she is also a hypochondriac, heavily prone to illness, uncoordinated, weak hearing, and chronically overeats.
Helga's most notable accomplishment was upon entering the city, immediately becoming terrified of her surroundings and then drinking from a toilet to calm her fears. She continued to wander the town till coming across a convience store whereupon she drank more toilet water. Helga survived for eight hours in the city before dying of multiple injuries.
APPLICATION STATUS: Rejected.
COMMENTS: Who the ♥♥♥♥ would ever want this person? -Alex S.

Will cause you to become completely xenophobic and hate everyone, 10/10 would cyka again.