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Oh buddy, where do I even begin, eh? You’re the maple syrup to my pancakes, the poutine to my fries, and yes—let's not forget the crown jewels of our friendship, your ♥♥♥♥ and balls. They're like a pair of Loonies and Toonies: uniquely Canadian, priceless, and always jingling in my thoughts. I love 'em more than a double-double from Timmies on a frosty morning.
You’ve got more pride in those bits than a Canuck has in their Molson Muscle after a 2-4 weekend, and I gotta say, I love every ounce of 'em—balls to the wall, eh?
Yours truly, with love and loonie-sized affection, [Your Name]
I just wanted to take a moment to let you know something important — no hard feelings about that unique night you had with Doris the sheep. We’ve all made our fair share of questionable decisions (I mean, who hasn’t kissed a cod, right?). But friendship, my man, that’s stronger than any one-night stand with livestock.
So yeah, I forgive you. No judgment here — you’re still the same ol’ Yetti I know and love. What happens in the barn stays in the barn, eh?
Let’s grab a double-double soon and laugh about this one over a box of Timbits. You’ve got nothing but love and forgiveness from me, buddy.
Always here for ya,
Your fears made flesh! 🥶 Solid of scale you might be, foul dragon... 💩 But I will riddle with holes your rotten hide! 🎯 With a hail of harpoons! 🏹